Grrrr.....sooo boredd!!!

Hey peeps.... it's after SPM bio paper, yea, so i was looking forward to a fun-filled day, but crap, i haven't got my license yet..... woke up at 9, FB and maple abit, then i was like, to hell with this cos it's after SPM and I'm still stuck with a FRIGGIN ANCIENT LAPTOP!! and yea, im still using broadband, so sue me people, I CANT EVEN DOWNLOAD THINGS......

So for that i can't really maple and all, LAG MAKES ME LOSE MY EXPERIENCE PERCENTAGE BY 10 O.o.... haizzz, not to even say bossing..... crap my life, i want some things to be better, hate being the middle child ==

Can't shake this feeling.......

Yea, the feeling...... most of us felt it before, but it just sucks. The feeling of being alone and just.... being alone, like for that moment, no one actually even care whether u exist or not. It's pitiful, and I can't stop feeling it. It's just there, it's hard, it's cold, whatever it is. It's like what I'm doing NOW, blogging to this empty wall, and knowingly well that no one is reading it... 


Yea this is a rant post.... Just had a hard time from Physics exam.... Looking forward for I still cling on the hope that the best is always yet to come...


Ciao~

SPM? 15 Days from now....

Yo peeps, 15 more days till my SPM ends. Suprisingly, it's just like a normal exam, only that because of it's importance , we who are sitting for it limit ourself to a certain degree so that we keep the seriousness in momentum..... haha, well, i guess i've lost mine, and so does some other people..... If i get straight A's,which is practically impossible now, I would do anything crazy just to get it. Obviously, i won't get it cause Sejarah is my doomed subject, includes Moral which i didn't really studied (but the paper was quite easy so praying hard for it >.< ) and of course, there's Add Maths and 2 science subject, Bio and Physics..... more worried bout Bio actually..... Chemistry is soo far my strongest subject so i don't have problems there :X, well, whatever it is, prayhard for good results >.< , keep us in your humble prayers :D

24 more days, and im still blur in my studies!!!

Yea, the countdown is WWWAAAAYYYY TOO NEAR! like seriously, time really pass so fast, i remember i try to calculate the days left and that time, it was 45 days, it felt just like yesterday.....

Neways, here's my updates of my long months of absence :X

- Practically, i only love 2 subjects in my studies..... Maths and chemistry, the rest i dun really care

- Selected for NS, shud be in first badge but i can't comfirm it yet.... even i try to find it online but the thing has also not been comfirm yet by the government ==

- Feel like I'm falling behind almost all of my friends who had got their driving license or future planned.... i still dunno what to do with my life.... like seriously... i'm not satisfied with EVERYTHING.....

- Because of no.3 in the list, i have some issues with my parents.... trying to concentrate on studies just makes it harder....

- failed my sejarah for my mock exam ==, i gt 39, but teacher passed me with a mere 1 mark... oh wells.... at least its a pass == , am doing sejarah revision as priority....

- I have lost my motivation in studies .... practically due to my seniors because they keep on saying it's easy and stuff.... i dun really blame them, but they should know that they went through that stage and i have not....

- And of course, i'm still worried bout SPM.... like seriously, i wanna get straight A's to get some good scholarships, parent's money i dun think will be enough, still need to fund my sis and my bro.....

- I still have to settle the finance of my school's YCS..... some of the sum of money was actually used but i dunno what it is, trying to recall with Damien but yea, i think we kinda over budget for AGM :x ... lol....

yeap, thats practically what i have stuck in my mind sooo far. And yea, i think this year's birthday was great because i manage to cover it up? :P, yea, few people know about it, but i just want to keep a low profile so that no one makes any fuss and stuff to buy presents :X (but deep down in my heart, i want some things for myself :P, haha) And i think there is no escape next year cos Adrian save it in his phone :X, thats unless i went overseas to study xD....

That's all i have to say, wish me and te rest of the Form 5 luck for SPM, yea, i dun think I'll be on9 till then, i even deactivate my FB account too! :X this is the time to focus on studies!

Ciao~

Sinners yet forgiven

Yes... lets face it.... WE ALL SIN .... not trying to condemn us or anything but its human to sin. The reason why this post came up to me was what I did randomly always.... flipping through the bible hoping God would speak to me through the page where i will stop. (Lol) yea.... soo i almost did it until i saw a poem i copy in a piece of paper in the bible. The poem was copied from one of the pictures in St. Lucas Centre, lols. It goes like this

When things go wrong,as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging, seems all uphill.
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but have to sigh.

When care is pressing, you down abit,
If you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer, with its twist and turns,
As everyone of us, sometimes learn.
And many a failure, turn about,
When he(Jesus) might have won have he stuck it out?

Don't give up, though the pace seems slow
You may succeed, with another blow

Success is failure, turn inside out,
The silver tint, of the clouds of doubt.
And you never can tell, how close you are,
It may be near, when it seems so far.

So stick in the fight, when you're hardest hit,
It is when things seems worse, you must not quit.

Don't quit! (forgetting what lies behind and reaching foward to what lies ahead) Phil 3:13

Yes, its long but meaningful. I was curious what this poem is about. I thought its only life in general, but specifically what?? So i looked into Phil 3:13. It was St.Paul's message to the Phillipians, saying "Of course my friends, I really do not think I have already won it; the one thing i do, however is to forget what is behind me and do my best to reach what is ahead"

Then, i flip to the book of the first letter to Timothy. I read BLINDLY then my eyes were caught on the verse 1 Tim 1:12-16. It speaks of Paul's conversion to Chriastianity. Now for those who don't know Paul, he was a Pharisee and prosecuted the Catholics in the beginning after Christ's ascension into heaven when the gospel was preach. He also stoned one of the faithful disciple to death. Altho he did alot of bad stuff, in the end it was he who contributed the most in preaching the Gospel worldwide!

So from his story, we can conclude one thing. Everyone is a sinner, even a Saint! Then we should learn from his story. to forget what wrong we do in the past, no matter how bad. Lying, stealing, everything will be of the past, provided that only you repent and make an effort to stop sinning. Paul doesn't just stop by just believing in Jesus, he became one of his faithful apostle and went to the extend to go againts the pharisees and spread the gospel. So we should repent, confessing our sins through the sacrament of confession is not enough. This include prayer and time of course. This isn't just a one day thing.... It might be longer than 20 years to just stop yourself from doing one sin! But always believe in God's promise of prayer that He will help you to stop sinning. Keep on praying and keep on trying. NEVER GIVE UP! Do not give up on the hope that Jesus death on the cross means that sin will not overpower our lives! Which brings us backs to the poem itself :).

I would like to end with this.
Fr.John Corapi shared this message:
Everyone has a bad habit, it might be pornography, sexual harrasments , stealing, one-night stand. I don't care who you are you have a weakness. Everyone has one~

crazy saturday and sunday

Yesterday (Saturday) , instead of having my usal morning add maths tuition, went off to a program called CLIOD (College Life In One Day) program organise by Taylor's College..... i pick Architecture class instead off SAM (South Australian Matriculation) which Amelia picked. Well it was fun. In Architecture class, we get to build stuff with legos. Some were chosen to build buildings while some were chosen to build a fotress/base. Then the fotress will present their model and say its advantage in defence, design and shape while the weapons will be presented and state their effectiveness againts which fotress they choose to destroy. Then we were ask to build bridges from straws and legos with the help of cellophone tape. It was fun, but too bad no pics. Then they days went on as usual, go to tuition on the afternoon and then mass.

For this morning, went off to the Sri Sarjana Form 4/5 revision for physics. Wanted to go for chemistry but went to walk walk instead with Isaac and Jonathan... went for lunch at hock lee, then go window shopping, and more window shopping and then Jonathan say, lets go 'The Rock Shop'. This shop, my first impression was, WTF! Seriously??... but when i saw the brands and the price i was like @.@.... imagine a original surf pants could cost you bout easily more than 100 ringgit? but here its like half price!!! yea, but din buy anything cos no money =.=" LOL...... sad life... haha... will go back there to buy something to fill my wardrobe!! And then went off to 'OneTJ' to look at computers specs and stuff.... Isaac remember about his father's coming birthday and bought him an 8GB pendrive.... and Jonathan just wanna find out more about the laptop he wishes to buy :O.....then we went home....well practically, they went hom....Jon was lazy to drive me back home, so he drop me at Isaac's place and i walk home ....... 40 minutes... reach home and sit in front of the computer till now.... so yea :P well, thats what has been happening to my life so far i guess? Chaoz~

7 months, and SPM is nearing......

Lols, its just as u had read it up there......time seriously move so fast as if someone wants us to die faster O.o , oh well, cant say much about it tho....... neway, updates since a very very long time......
Came back from MYC, was quite fun but as i had experience in camps, organizing one is such a tough job...... seriously.... and i've been on 3 and they give me a handful of stuff.
And after the camp it was nothing much. We did a YCS gathering for that and it was one of the Evaluation Meeting for the younger generations to take over our post :D . Had fun in the meeting, yes, the people are actually quite good for their first times because they are in comittee since this year, but last time, it was only me, damien and dick..... haizz, and we are so new, but damien took up the courage to speak so he get the president post :S, boo hoo =.=" haha. Neway, notice some tweaks here and there but the whole thing was ok for the meeting....... we only had a hard time to post them in the comittees as they are the current comittees as well and there are new comittees too.
Then there is parent's day, and instead of teachers complaining its parents =.=" the usual larh.... haizz, "my mum was like, he is always in front of the computer at home" ....haizz.... wad to do ryte.... and i found out i havent get my form 4 YCS marks :O..... so now my current KK marks is 0.... seriously.... this KK thing in our year SUCK! I mean, why is the government doing so..... if there is alot of candidate to choose from to give scholarship, then why not all , invest money on them , on the young.... so that our country can grow intellectually .... not wasting some billions of ringgit trying to connect Sarawak and Sabah to west Malaysia...........
Haizzzz....school is not about competition, its about education and social life.....sometimes i dunno why the heck im going to school anymore......and yea, met some really nice friends in MYC, Rex...( lols... I wud have met him sooner if i was serving for ER this year but no.... my parents did not allow me to and during that weekend they go Sematan... WTF ryte, i missed one ER because of this.... but i guess wad to do la. God ask me to obey them anyways........), Michelle Yap(someone's gf *coughcough* , Blaise Tan (Ben's bro) and some others :D , nice meeting with u all and hope you can stand my akwardness,lameness and stupidness :)

Hmmm~

Just another post, to keep this thing alive.... hehe, updates.... School exam is coming in three weeks time, all form 4 chapters are coming out. And there is the issue of my mom keep on nag nag nag nag nag..... lol, yea keep on saying bad stuff about me and the thing im facing now, the computer. She nag me, then complain to my sis in Adelaide, then my sis sms me to tell me what she said..... and I forgot to tell her that, its something like, during your SPM year, you still have commitments for clubs in school, but she don't allow you to go for it, cos i kinda sacrifice most of my activities, and i can't let this one go......k, moving on, ER2010 is coming soon, and its one of the things i sacrificed to not go this year, will miss some important stuff, but they wun understand larh =.=" lol. That's about it I guess.

BTW, i got this from my dream, dunno what it means, i think it was some kinda gathering in St.Joseph's school canteen , and were carrying stuff, then Alex Lee sang this first sentence of a song, "Holding onto you......." and i woke up with that stuck in my head for quite ahwhile now, might be able to compose a song but, it will be too late for the song writing competition for ER, and i have a good bridge for it already, the only thing is the chorus and the rest of the verse..... will update bout it, if I'm passionate bout finishing it of course :)

Back? lol

Yes, i know, haven't been posting in ahwhie, there's soo much to say, but mostly negatives ones since I'm the type of person who doesn't have anything interesting in his life... (it's just an on-going routine O.o) Haha... Just spend most of my time, reading manga, watching anime, and lvling my MS character.... gosh , soo lazy to get to third job, and its like 4 lvls away.......

ER is coming in its way and the sad news? I can't go... yea, just because of SPM year and parents being fussy bout this (altho it doesn't make sense cos' its like only a few hours??? )... SPM year had been sucking the blood out of me... (mostly to anyone who feels it) like the example above, my first test results was kinda bad.... get two fails and 3 4x% subjects.... in an insufficient fund state, and above all, home isn't not really like home anymore...... haizzz, also wonder what happen....

Seek revelation from God @.@ lols, yea, since I spend less time in Empowered, I kinda feel like the gap in the relationship is growing..... my behavior changes too, i notice.... But I had been trying hard to improve in guitar and some of my weak subjects. For now, i can say that I'm confident in Chemistry( for some reason, Form 4 topics are kinda harder than Form 5 o.o) and I'm struggling with Bio including Physics........

Well, guess that's it from me, till next time i guess, gonna try to update more... Ciao~

The past, the present, and the future

After Alter Server's Sunset Mass meeting, and Empowered Mass Media meeting, wemnt for late lunch (if that's what you call it). Yeap, missed all the lameness and stuff. And new jokes... haha, glad to see these people having fun....

Was glad too that I'm missed.... haha, sound so despo.... yea, thx Alex for missing me HAHA and for those new lame jokes.... was finally having a good time LOL-ing haha....

Then, on the way back, Kinda find out about other's past, about how they were before now, and stuff, and felt bad larh, I mean, can you imagine a good person was like (sorry to use this) BIATCH before??? Seriously..... Then again, was glad that they had changed over the years.

And now, been hearing bad stuffs about close friends these days, from other friends.... I dunno what to do or say larh, I wanted to put into their mind, judge yourself first ok??? (but i do not want to because that makes me become them sometimes)..... not to say that I am finding faults but, everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, so just accept them for who they are, rather than feeling bad about it, if still feel bad about it, try talking to them about it and you will find the reason why, (worries, past hurts, addictions??)

So, that's how my life so far... ntg much also larh..... hehe hoping for more updates

P/s : If possible pls help me in brainstorming ideas for a teaser video for ER2010.
The theme has already been decided (watch the video 2 post below) GLORY.
Can come up with any ideas for now.... but if possible try to make a sketch (a storyline).
And PLEASE be reminded that ER = Catholic Event.... hehe (ps yarh)

Let me decide for myself!

Gosh, had a very terrible shopping.... Wanted to get some 'refreshment' for the old wardrobe, was intending to buy jeans and of course... SURF PANTS xD, could actually buy one, but Mom don't allow. Can't believe she did that, and she won't even listen to me when I try to explain the customer's service counter is on th top floor, she sengaja go the ground floor... haiz....

Well, I'm happy with only one item that was bought and that is the new Oreef jeans I get, for RM96 (yes, expensive I know)after a 20% discount. Could have bought a nice surf pants too, but too bad, tough luck. Alex promise to buy me one for last christmas present, but we hadn't contact each other for so long... And now everyone is at EWA, so I don't expect to see them all tonight at mass...... Grrr, will find my chance to get A SURF PANTS~

Till then, Chao~

First time humiliation in 2010?? and other stuffs...

SHIT! Didn't finish Add Maths, considering all the other homeworks I had, (BM,English, Sejarah, Chemistry reports, Maths) Gosh, teachers nowadays dunno what we have to go through just to get the job done. WE HAVE A LIFE for God's sake =.=" , and half of it is covered by TUITION and EXTRA CLASSES!!! Am guessing, gonna stand outside of class on Tuesday.... Gosh, asked him whether can pass up on Monday, since he didn't have any class with us, he said no. Well, i dun care, jus gonna pass it on Monday so he should just suck it up to his face! Well, maybe I was wrong, but I think I deserve a second chance considering how 'good' I am to finish your homework so far......

Not only that, the darn Moral teacher, said she don't mind people talking, but then she complaint a second later.... I was like WTF??? Does she even understand the word don't mind?? And she said this out loud ok?? Plus, she was like dunno what activity to do for each Moral classes, so she call us to just read the textbook which is like so wasting time (could have done my Add Maths during this period if she didn't EXIST!) . And gt lecture from Pn.Dewi about not being up to her expectation.... GRRRR Even in B class got expectation, I did not go to A class just to find myself in a lower class with EXPECTATION! lols.... gosh, dunno why la every teacher today like got problem with us one....


Anyway.....

EWA (Empowered Weekend Away) started today, and I manage to finish the ER video with the theme and pass it to Pius before they went there.

Well there is some minor mistake with it, but I think I'll just post it out...


yea, there are some minor mistakes, but will fix it as soon as i gt my pen drive back from Pius after EWA, so enjoy xD. (spot the mistake! hehe)

Am I that person?

Was looking through all the past affirmation letters during CE09 and Servant's Retreat....
And some of them was unexpected, while some of them I'm thankful for they are my friends whom I've met and had a good time together.

Ya...so, when i saw all those affirmation, I was asking myself that was I like that?? I mean, I may never know it. And besides, someone might just write just to cheer me up, but what if they were sincere?? Hehe, and I don't see me working here, but God himself, that has been working through me all this while. And I'm glad that the Lord had used me in a way to touch 'some people's life'... hehe. Well, that's the update i guess xD.